Dealing with a Bad Day

“Many are the afflictions of the righteous: but the Lord delivereth him out of them all. He keepeth all his bones: not one of them is broken. Evil shall slay the wicked: and they that hate the righteous shall be desolate. The Lord redeemeth the soul of His servants: and none of them that trust in Him shall be desolate.” (Psalm 34:19-22)

Ever have a bad day where your emotions get the best of you? Everything is just so frustrating and that one last thing puts you over the edge, so much so that you can’t stop yourself from exploding with anger. For a brief moment, you feel a huge sense of relief, but it isn’t long before the guilt sets in; you just released your fury upon a co-worker, a friend, a spouse, a stranger, someone who in retrospect didn’t really deserve all of that. On second thought, you admit you were a bit harsh in your delivery. What you said wasn’t necessarily untrue, but how you said it may not have been called for. Yep, I’ve been there and done that one too many times. So what’s God got to say about it? I set out to break this cycle that always looms on those really bad days.

The Emotional Roller-coaster

I don’t know about you, but when I am upset, it just always seems to be a laundry list of things. After a stressful day at work, I can get mad at my husband for not starting dinner or taking out the trash, and then I see one dirty dish in the sink that immediately floods my mind with negative thoughts. He doesn’t care about helping you, he is lazy, work is too much, nothing will ever change; all of these lies start seeping in all over some small chores to get me to believe lies about my husband.

The enemy will tell you ten truths in an attempt to feed you one lie, and there is nothing he is more opposed to than family; he wants to ruin my marriage because God created it. If I allow myself- and mind you I have done it before- to let my emotions get the best of me, then I will just be projecting my anger onto my husband. Misery loves company and evidently so does anger.

When you’re on the emotional roller-coaster, it’s hard to get off and sometimes all we do is bring other people on the ride with us. The twists and turns leave me sick to my stomach, and waves of regret always come when the ride finally comes to an end. But Jesus came to calm the storm.

Peace Be Still

In Luke 8:22-25, we find the disciples sleeping at sea when a perilous storm of wind and rain fills the ship with water. In a panic, the disciples wake Jesus telling Him they are going to die. Sometimes when all my problems pile up how I’m going to make it seems unimaginable. But Jesus arose and “rebuked the wind and the raging of the water, and they ceased and there was a calm. And He said until them, ‘Where is your faith?” (v.24-25). And when I take it to God in prayer- all of the anger, frustration, tears, whatever it is that’s got me down- He gives me an unexplainable peace, the kind I imagine the disciples felt when Jesus calmed the sea (Mark 4:39). He always works it all out, and I hear Him ask me the same question.

A Matter of Faith

I’ve discovered that how we handle these bad days, is more than just our need for control of our lives as humans; it is a matter of our faith in who God is and who He says we are.

Who has God been to you?

Here are just a few things I have learned about who He is:

  • All Mighty – There is nothing He does not have the power to do (1 Chron 29:11, Jer 37:28, Rev 1:8).
  • The Ultimate Provider – Every good gift comes from Him, and I have never gone without, thanks be to God (Phil 4:19, Ps 23, Matt 7:7).
  • My Healer – He is Jehovah Rapha, and He can heal any wound, no matter how large and how horrible it may feel (1 Peter 2:24, Ex 15:26).
  • My Father – He loves, so dearly. There is no greater love than that of The Father (John 10:10, 1 John 4:4).
What has God said about you?

He has called me:

  • His Daughter – I am His and He loves me deeply (Gal 3:26, Rom 8:14, Matt 19:14).
  • His Disciple – I am a follower of Jesus, meaning I love and obey Him. I do as He asks, and I seek to be more like Him every day. Others look at me and should see Him (Matt 28:19-20, John 15:16, Acts 1:8).
  • His Heiress -I am a part of His family. Through Jesus I have been adopted into His family and therefore entitled to an inheritance of eternal life in the presence of God (Rom 8:17, Gal 4:7).
  • Renewed – I am a new creation. I am not defined by my past (2 Cor 5:17).

And so when Jesus asks the disciples, as He at some point asks all of us Christians, “Why are you so fearful? How is it that you have no faith?” (Mark 4:40), then I question all of my crazy emotions. I repent of the outbursts, the lashing out, all the times I chose not to hold my tongue out of fear that I wouldn’t be heard, fear that I wouldn’t make it, and an absolute resolve that I had to fix it myself. This is one of the devil’s biggest lies to humanity: the idea that we have to fix it ourselves. When in fact we have The Great I Am battling for us, and He has never lost a battle yet.

God’s Amazing Grace Can Take Away Any Bad Day

Thank God for His grace at the end any bad day, the ones where I fall short and give in to my emotions. I come to the throne and cry to God for forgiveness and for change. And without a doubt, He shows up. His Holy Spirit consoles me and assures me it will be okay. I feel His peace and know I am forgiven. Then I open the Word to look for something that will remind me of this moment, that will be my guiding word for next time my emotions spin out of control.

I read God’s response to my cry and I begin to praise Him for delivering me from me and from the negative thoughts the enemy whispers in my ear. I praise Him for the mercy, the hand, the love that He extends to me whenever I fall. His grace makes me work to change and be better. It is the reassurance that I am not doing it alone, that God alone can and is currently and will continually change me for the better.

I Can Avoid A Bad Day with a Change In Me

So now when I want to scream at my husband over something so small, I stop and cry it out to God. I pray that He reveals to my husband his own errors, so I don’t have to. I ask God to take away my anger and replace it with an appreciation for all my husband does do. And I call the angel of the Lord to deliver me from the critical spirit that causes me to explode. And lo and behold, my husband comes to me and asks for forgiveness, we sit down and talk about our frustrations, and we work out a solution to the problem together. God is faithful; if we just trust Him with our everything, then we will see Him magnify Himself in and through our lives.

On The Next Bad Day

So for the next time those emotions start to flood, here are some tips I have found helpful during the bad days:

  • Pray – Immediately give it to God. He can work out EVERYTHING. If you need to cry, then do so. He will comfort you. (Phil 4:6-7)
  • Write it down – If you need to get it out, write it out. Let your emotions out in a healthy way.
  • Sing/ listen to music – Turn on your rainy day song. It should be a song that inspires you, that moves you. Pick it today, so that when the time comes, you have it ready to go.
  • Read a Psalm – The majority of the psalms were written by David during his many bad days. I can always find a chapter that resonates with me when I’m going through a hard time and seeing encouragement. In the 150 psalms, I’m sure you can too. I recommend Psalm 18, 34, & 46, to name a few.
  • Take a Breather – Sometimes, remembering to take 5 minutes to just breathe, and focus on the in and out of your breath can alleviate the stress and lower the adrenaline levels necessary to clear your head.

Nip it in the bud early, so that you don’t have to wait until it’s all piled up. And remember, God is with you always. He will not leave you nor forsake you. He goes before you, wherever you go (Deut 31:6).